


Torch Song

by Gedry



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Drag Queens, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-07
Updated: 2017-11-07
Packaged: 2019-01-30 13:27:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,781
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12654447
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gedry/pseuds/Gedry
Summary: Gabriel’s the head liner in the best drag show in town.  The Valentine’s Day show is a big night for them, and Gabriel’s least favorite holiday.  But maybe things change when the man that got away all those years ago is spotted in the audience during his first act.





	Torch Song

**Torch Song**

It’s a packed crowd tonight, holidays are like that. For some reason the season of love makes straight couples do all kinds of crazy things they wouldn’t normally do. Balthazar parts the velvet curtain with a manicured hand and watches as the crowd settles into their seats; drinks from the bar in hand. The stage lights still make it look smoky even though actual smoking was outlawed years ago. Along with the music it adds to the feel of doing something mysterious and a little bit dirty. 

The Three Winged Fairy specializes in that. 

Balthazar started the club a few years ago in the middle of a down town revival. It didn't hurt that the area had a pretty hopping gay population too. He and two college friends got together and decided to pool their collective talents into one co-operative entity. In a flurry of glitter and falsies, their drag club was born. 

Now, if you want a decent drag act and variety show this is where you come, especially on Valentine’s Day. Balthazar’s drawing away from the curtain, heading back to put the finishing touches on his make-up, when he sees him. The big HIM. 

Gabriel’s him, The Righteous Man, the one that got away. 

Balthazar runs to the dressing room as fast as you can in size thirteen, three inch heels; his shimmering silver sequined dress shaking with the movement. He rips past the band, rushes through the juggling act, and slams into their changing room with so much force that Castiel almost smears his ruby red lipstick up the side of his face. 

“Balthazar,” Castiel growls as he yanks a bunch of wet wipes out of the container next to his station to dab at the invisible damage to his make up. “Why are your panties in such a bunch?”

“Where’s Gabriel?” Balthazar questions as he pants. 

“He’s putting on his dress,” Castiel points to the small adjoining room. “Why? Is he running late?”

“He’s here,” Balthazar hisses through glossy lips. “Dean Winchester is here.”

“Oh dear,” Cas sighs as he drops his lip brush and rolls his eyes. “Gabriel’s going to be all full frontal bitch tonight. Better hide the chocolate.”

“Why?” Gabriel asks as he steps around the door in full drag. The change is dramatic; his normally amber gaze hidden by green contacts and a ton of make-up that shifts his usually tanned skin to something softer, paler. He’s poured himself into an emerald green satin gown that’s short in the front with a long train and topped it all off with a red-headed wig. 

“You have to change your routine,” Balthazar orders. 

“I don’t have to do anything,” Gabriel snorts. “Except get to the stage on time.”

“Dean’s here,” Cas comments as he tugs on his black wig over his wig cap and clips on his diamond earrings. “The return of your little straight boy that escaped your clutches all those years ago.”

“Where?” Gabriel demands as he turns and heads toward the stage in flurry of agitated motion. 

“Second left of center,” Balthazar answers. “Please, don’t do this Gabriel.”

“He came for a show,” Gabriel answers with an evil smile before sashaying away. “And that’s what I’m going to give him.”

The door slams shut behind their headliner's back and Balthazar mutters, “Drama whore.” 

“Indeed,” Cas sighs before turning and asking, “Zip me up, Balthie?”

*****

“LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,” the announcer calls out over the PA system. “I KNOW THERE HAVE TO BE SOME OF YOU OUT THERE? LET’S BRING HER TO THE STAGE PEOPLE…THE LOVELY, THE DARING, THE TOTALLY UNCARING……MS. HONEY DO.”

Gabriel takes a deep breath, finding his character before swirling onto the stage with a sneer and a wink. Honey has power here, she’s in control, nothing touches Gabriel when he puts on his face and becomes her.

“People always ask me why my name is Honey Do,” Honey slurs into the microphone. “I tell them it’s because there’s nothing Honey Don’t.”

The crowd laughs; it’s got a good feel tonight. He’s starting to think this might not be too bad. “Well happy Valentine’s Day, bitches. I see a lot of couples out there. I just want you to know...” there’s a pause before Gabriel drops from Honey’s higher pitched voice into his regular tones and adds, “I fucking hate you.” 

They laugh again; Honey drapes herself on the side of the piano. “Love is over-rated,” Honey sighs dramatically. “Trust me Sweeties, I know. I’ve been loved up one side and down the other, inside and out, in every hole you can think of. It’s just not worth it. I signed off on love a hell of a long time ago. So if you’re here to learn about the joys of emotional connections then pick up your drink, grab your date, and get the fuck out. I’m going to tell it how it really is….Love hurts.”

The piano starts into his first song and Gabriel spends most of Honey's number trying to get Dean’s eye from where he sits in the audience. When their eyes meet the damn spark that Gabriel’s never gotten over bursts back into a flame between them even across the darkened room. 

Dean’s alone; all of his focus pointed toward the stage as Honey sings, twists, and twirls. There’s an untouched drink at his elbow. To get a seat so close he would have had to have gotten here hours ago. Gabriel's so close he could reach out and touch him. Gabriel wants to touch him. After all these years apart, after everything he’s gone through without this man who was once the center of his heart, he still wants him. 

It makes Gabriel angry to the point of seeing stars. He smothers it, as much as he can, under Honey’s natural sass. 

When the song ends Gabriel grabs himself a drink as the crowd cheers. “I’ve had two great loves in my lifetime,” Honey coos into the microphone. “The first one was so special I’m not going to talk about him. He was perfect, young, beautiful, and gone much, much too soon.” 

Way too soon, Very few people know about Gabriel lover, Andy. Ten years his junior they had a whirl wind romance culminating with them moving in together. One night Andy had gone out for ice cream and had been beaten to death by a group of neighborhood kids for his wallet. Gabriel’s never recovered. 

“But the other one,” Honey says a little louder. “That one I’ll explain to you in detail so you know where you’re going when you say you’re in love.” 

“I was young once,” Honey chuckles. “I know you don’t believe me, because I am one old and tired bitch, but it’s true. And holy fuck, I was pretty back in the day. You know, when you’re still half a kid and half fully grown; back when my tits stayed up without my bra on.”

He just keeps talking over the laughter, focused entirely on Dean’s frozen, mirthless face. “Anyway, back in the day I met a boy. God, was he hot shit. He was golden and green eyed with just a little bit of freckles splattered all over his face. I love me a butch man too, girls; something to wrap myself around and lean into. Love them rugged and growly, a real man’s man. You know what the problem is with those types of men though?” 

“NO!” From the crowd. 

“They aren’t GAY!” Honey crows. “Straight as fucking arrows the whole bunch of them. What can I say? I love what I can’t have and this boy, oh, I loved him. He made me melt inside. Me and every Susan, Shirley, Cynthia, and Joanna. You see where I’m going with this, girls?”

Honey makes her way to the edge of the stage in a grand gesture of waving arms and swinging hips. “See that’s the thing about those bi-curious types. They’re curious about everything and everybody. So I got involved thinking ‘maybe I can make this work. He seems really into me,’ and he was; balls deep into my ass every Thursday night for a year and a half. But it wasn’t real to him, wasn’t enough for him. That says a lot too, because with Honey, sometimes I wear the pants and sometimes I wear the panties. Hell, if you want and your good enough I’ll let you wear the panties every once in a while. I’m homo-flexible.” 

He swears he sees Dean blushing. Gabriel sure hasn’t forgotten some of their wilder night together. He bets Dean hasn’t either. 

“But enough about me for a while,” Honey smiles. “Have I got a show for you ladies! My sister? She's an angel on land! She’s so hot she melts butter without a pan. Let’s have a round of applause for Blue Eyed Betty.” 

Cas brushes by Gabriel on his way onto the stage. The look in the other queen’s eyes said everything Gabriel knows he can’t give voice to right now. Go to the dressing room, Castiel’s eyes say, Lock the door and don’t let him in. 

But Gabriel knows Dean is already moving to follow him behind stage. This night isn’t going to end without a confrontation. 

******

He hears the door open as he’s changing his wig at the vanity they all share. Gabriel doesn’t bother to turn around, holding onto Honey’s persona as a shield and a sword. 

“Sweetie,” he sing-songs in Honey’s southern tones. “They don’t let our adoring crowd back here. You need to wait out front, Sugar.”

It’s a ploy; they both know he can clearly see Dean in the mirror. 

“Is that really how you remember us?” Dean asks. Gabriel meets his eyes in the reflection. His voice is deeper, richer now, but Gabriel would know it anywhere. You don’t forget the first person you give your heart too, especially when they rejected you so harshly. 

“You tell me what I said that was a lie,” Gabriel challenges in Honey’s voice. He’s only slightly gratified when Dean holds his tongue. “Look,” he sighs and bats his eyelashes. “You know, you’re still a good looking guy for your age. Why don't you go on back to your table and cuddle up with your girlfriend? Just go enjoy the music and forget about the past. What’s done is done. Its all water under the bridge, Darling” 

“Stop it,” Dean growls as he spins Gabriel around so they’re face to face. “I didn’t come back here to talk to Honey. I want to talk to Gabriel.”

“Sorry pumpkin,” Honey grins falsely, shaking out of Dean's grasp. “He’s not here right now. You’ll have to leave a message.” 

He grabs the train of his dress and starts to step around Dean and out the door. All he has to do it get back to the stage and he’ll be safe. Gabriel’s so weak when it comes to Dean Winchester. He wants the love and affection he could see boiling under the surface even after all these years. But as Honey, he can close it off and walk away; just like Dean walked away from him. 

“I’m so sorry,” Dean says softly just before Gabriel makes it away from the mirror. “I’m sorry for what happened between us, but more than that I’m sorry for Andy. I know you two were happy.” 

“Don’t you DARE!” Gabriel bellows as he takes his glass of water off the vanity and hurls it into Dean’s face; genteel Honey just melts away as rage boils up inside him. “You don’t get to speak to me about him. You don’t ever get to say his name.” 

Oh…it hurts so much. It’s been three years and it still feels like he’s dying inside. The tears well up and Gabriel crumples in on himself as if he’s physically in pain. 

“Please. Don’t do that,” Dean whispers as he grabs for the box of tissues on the counter. “You’re going to ruin your make-up.”

Gabriel snorts with laughter as the other man dabs at his eyes. Dean smells the same, a strange mix of motor oil and chalk that Gabriel’s never found on anyone but him. It makes his stomach clench and his pulse race. This whole situation is ridiculous. He hesitates then reaches up to swipe some of the thrown water off of Dean’s face and neck. “I shouldn’t have done that,” Gabriel offers shakily. 

“I deserved it,” Dean shrugs. “Look, I know I’m out of time here and you have to get back on stage…but I want a chance to talk to you after the show.” 

Gabriel jerks back in alarm. Having Dean seek him out is one thing; willfully meeting with him is another. He’s not sure he can handle that. 

Dean continues, “There’s a lot of history you don’t understand because I never told you back then and it won’t excuse my actions, because I was a total asshole, but I need to tell you anyway.”

“What do you want from me?” Gabriel gasps. He’s flustered, nervous, confused about the whole thing between them. It’s not supposed to be like this. It’s been over a decade. Why is everything just rushing back so fast?

“I just want to talk,” Dean answers. “Just come have coffee with me after the show, some place you pick, I don’t care where. Just give me tonight to explain. After that, if you never want to see me again I’ll go and I swear I’ll never come back.”

“What if I want you to come back?” Gabriel asks. 

“Whatever you’re willing to give me I’ll take,” Dean whispers. “I came here alone. I’m not with anyone. I came for you.”

There’s banging on the door and Gabriel snaps back into where he is and who he is. He has a job he has to do. 

“That’s my cue, Sugar,” Honey smirks with a pinch to Dean’s chin. Gabriel falls back into his alter ego with a huge feeling a relief. He spins on his heels and escapes.  
*****

“So tell me love birds,” Honey calls out as she storms the stage and pushes herself up to sit on the piano. “How do we all feel about second chances?”

The crowd goes wild. 

Honey finishes the show. Gabriel spends twice as long as normal cleaning his make-up off at the end of the night. He's a wreck as he's packing his stuff. His stomach is in knots, his hands are shaking. 

"You're meeting him," Castiel comments. It’s not a question.

“He is not,” Balthazar hisses from behind the dressing room door. “Tell me you’re not.”

“You don’t know him,” Gabriel says quietly.

“Neither do you,” Balthazar blurts as he leaves the dressing room and joins them in front of the mirror. 

“Which is exactly why he’s going with him,” Castiel exclaims as he throws his eye liner into his bag while he packs up for the night. “This has been forever in coming. You haven’t been on a date in years. Whatever you got going on down there is going to close up, Gabriel. Go out and use it.” 

“Use a condom,” Balthazar orders. “Use two. You don’t know where he’s been all this time.”

“I am not going to fuck him,” Gabriel barks. “At least not tonight. When did you get such a filthy mouth, Cas?”

“It’s always the quiet ones,” Balthazar chuckles. “But he does have a point; it’s time to get back on the ride, my lovely.” 

“I hate you both,” Gabriel grumbles. 

“We love you too,” Castiel smiles. “Now get out of here. We can’t talk about you behind your back if you never leave.”

*****

“I didn’t think you were going to come,” Dean comments as Gabriel rounds the corner out into the parking lot. Gabriel really should have expected it, Dean’s leaning heavily against that same Chevy Impala he had the last time they were together. 

“But you stayed,” Gabriel points out. 

“I would have waited all night,” Dean admits with a slow shuffle of his feet. “I owe you at least that much.”

Gabriel doesn’t answer but he crosses the distance between them and slides into the classic Impala when Dean opens the door for him. 

“Where to?” Dean asks as he pulls out of the parking spot and heads for the street. 

“That way,” Gabriel points. 

“So we’re going straight,” Dean teases.

“Gaily forward,” Gabriel corrects. “I don’t go straight.”

Dean rolls his eyes at the old joke as they pull out onto the street. His knuckles brush against the back of Gabriel’s hand on the seat between them while they find their way together.


End file.
